Its one of the hardest words to say isnt it. Especially as a mother. To ask for help, to ask for advice, to not know everything and not have the answer.
As a new Mum who’d had an emergency c-section at 16 I was determined that I wouldnt ask anyone for help because if I did someone would take my baby from me, or they would say I told you so. I struggled. I fought. I battled.
But one day it got too much and I had to give in and ask for the help. I didnt have supportive health visitors so I went to my GP, she contacted my health visitor but explained what she wanted to happen and the health visitor put it into place. Homestart. That was the answer. One organisation.
If you havent yet heard of homestart they are a charity who recruit volunteers and match them with clients who need someone to lean on a little bit.
I was paired with D and she changed my life. She gave me the friendship I was lacking from all my non parent friends, I had NO friends that were parents that could understand what it was like. She could and she did. She listened to me when I needed someone to hear me, she helped me find the right help when I needed it, she encouraged me and boosted my confidence in my parenting when she watched me interacting with my son and told me I was doing well. I wouldnt be the Mum I am today if it wasnt for her.
Admitting I needed the help was hard and I felt weak in doing so but I eventually realised that actually by asking for help we can turn into better mothers. Weather we ask support services or just our friends on twitter, facebook, over a cup of tea. That little bit of advice might just be the catalyst that changes everything.
So if your starting out as a new mum and are finding it hard, dont be afraid. Yes that four letter word is hard. Yes for a few minutes you may feel weak for saying it. But in the long run? It will be better.
Mumable Author: Hayley Glenister
